Finishing the Race Amongst Cheers & Jeers

Most of us will agree that it is an energizing feeling when we are cheered on & it can be draining if we are jeered.  It can take a vast amount of effort on our part to grow beyond both the external cheers and jeers to a place where we can just be okay no matter what.  Here’s my thought & that is that if someone is genuinely trying & not quitting then that’s a person that I celebrate.  Quitting anything can be the easiest thing in the world don’t you think?  Perhaps we sign up for a sport or other community group & not long after the program commences we find out that the program is not what we pictured it would be.  It does not mean that there is anything wrong with the program or us but rather that it is not a snug fit for us.  What do we choose to do with that realization?  Would it be easy to pack it in right away & quit?  We each answer that question for ourselves.  What I find is that for me if I signed on for 3 months, a year or another specific amount of time that I finish that commitment & then move on to something else that is a snug fit for me.  It is the same guiding principle that I share as a parent.  Our sons over the years have for instance tried a variety of sports.  Some of the sports they have found to not be for them.  They know that if they sign up for a season though that they have made a commitment, given their word for that timeframe & that quitting is not an option.  They finish out the season.  Perhaps you have had these experiences with yourself or your children as well.  Easy is not right in my mind & I have found that so often in life that doing what is right is usually more difficult at times yet so worth it.

Here’s a story to share with you about a recent experience of not giving up.  It is near & dear to my heart.  Our second born son, Brian is a joiner.  He likes to try new things & he usually has a picture in his mind’s eye of what the experience will be like.  At times, the experience does not match up to the picture in his mind.  He has always loved to run so this was an exciting year at school for him since it is the first year that he was old enough to join the cross country running team.  Several weeks ago he signed up for the first large cross country race.  It was a gorgeous Fall day outside & the race was located at a huge local provincial park.  The children & their parents got to walk the race course together prior to the race so that the children could become acquainted with the route prior to the actual race.  As Brian & I held hands & walked the course together, our Dear Heart son was beaming.  He had an expectation that this was going to be a fantastic experience.  He had been practicing for many weeks & it was all leading up to this first race.  He added that he felt nervous & that he did not want to let down his school team by running too slowly.  Brian shared with me that he felt that he was not a very fast runner.  He also said that he felt kind of nervous as well because a child on his team told him the day before that “you are definitely going to come in last & embarrass our school.”  I turned to Brian as we walked & said to him that the only way to come in last is not to finish the race.  I told him that every single person who finished the race was going to be a champion that day.  I told him that it did not matter what number he finished in but rather to focus on finishing the race.  I also reminded him that just because someone says something to us at times, it does not make what they have said true.  This is the case I believe whether we are being cheered or jeered.  We are neither good nor bad because someone says or thinks it about us or says it about us.   I will say that my heart hurt for our son though all the same that he had received those words from a teammate or anyone else.  I also wondered what we are teaching our youth.  Sportsmanship was not shining through that’s for sure.

The children had to run the race without any parent support.  I respect the rule & understand it.  There were a lot of participants.  Waiting for Brian at the finish line felt like time was standing still.  As an aside after briskly walking the course with Brian I went into hypoglycemia wouldn’t you know it even though I had turned my insulin pump settings to 10%!  Yikes, being in a crowd when trying to come out of low blood sugar that day was a challenge.  All that aside, the day was about Brian so I ate my way out of the low quickly & got to the finish line to watch for him.  Time went by & most of the runners had passed the finish line.  The crowd began to move away from the finish line & towards the area where the ribbons would be handed out.  The people that were still gathered at the finish line dwindled & dwindled.  I became worried that Brian was somewhere along the lengthy course feeling defeated & had potentially given up when he saw the many children passing him on the course.  Finally, Brian crossed the finish line with tears streaming down his beautiful face.  Then came the words from Brian of, “Mom, I came in last & lost the race.”  I hugged our son as tightly as I possibly could & said, “Brian, I am so proud of you son & sweetheart, you finished the race & that means that you are a champion.”  He looked at me & said, “I did not quit Mom even though it was hard.”  I told him I knew exactly what he meant & how proud I am of him.

At times we tell ourselves that we have failed or come in last & other times other people may tell us this.  We don’t have to listen nor believe these thoughts or words.  Sometimes we may each need a reminder from someone who loves us beyond words to light us back up with the truth.  It can be a challenge at times to not become attracted to feeling the need for others’ approval.  For me, I work at not depending on anyone’s approval one way or the other.  If I do the next right thing & I am condemned for it, it is still the right thing & if I make a poor decision & receive accolades for it, it was still a poor decision.  That’s how I look at it.  We all want to be liked yet not at the price of being addicted to hearing words of constant approval at least I find.  An alternate compass that I have found to be invaluable is the inner compass that simply tells me if I am doing the next right thing or if I need a course correction.  The truth is the truth.

Type 1 diabetes or other 365 health challenges may be teaching us daily that we need to finish each day’s race.  That simply means, that no matter whether it has been a brutally challenging day or a great day, we choose to not quit.  We can choose to lean on one another on the especially trying days & finish each day with a champion’s heart.  The thing I have noticed is that the people with the greatest challenges jump the highest hurdles & have profoundly beautiful & caring hearts that they just naturally share with the world.  There is a spirit of walking one another to the finish line each day. 

My heart’s hope for you is that every single day you know that you have at least 1 Battle Buddy who will walk you to the finish line.  I hope they are there with a hug the stuffing out of you hug & loving words & actions too!

Smiles,  Saundie  :)

May you feel your champion's heart every day & next Monday's sharing is "S Storm Tidal Wave!"  Although I love Christmas, I have found that with it comes often "stuff" that requires barriers of steel :)