If you are like me & countless other folks, a trip to the dentist’s office is something that you look forward to being over with.  Diabetes or no diabetes, taking care of our teeth is the “next right thing to do.”  Here’s the part that may surprise you.  Going to the dental office can be a laughing matter!

It is great when you can find clothes (hoodies or pants) that are “diabetes friendly.”  Style can be a bonus yet if I am looking for something “perfect” for walking, I am thrilled when I find clothing that is functional & meets the need to inconspicuously & comfortably carry my diabetes supplies.  Early spring, I found a hoodie that was “the one” for walking.  Super…it had secret inside pockets…2 of those & of course 2 outside pockets.  That meant that I could put my meter in one inside pocket & my fast acting sugar in the other “secret” pocket & then pack my walking music in an outside pocket & my cell phone in the other outside pocket.  Sensational, I thought!

Stay with me…there really is a connection between the dentist, humour & walking clothes!  One morning late last spring, I got up super early & put all my “supplies” into my “super hoodie” & off our goldie (Beddy) & I went on a nice long walk to the lake & back.  It was a gorgeous, sunny day out & there were oodles of other people out walking as well.  Every so often, Beddy & I stopped to have a wee chat with other folks.  Well, having a bit of the “gift of the gab” (was that inherited ha! Ha!), I course lost track of time.  Yikes, I checked the time half-way along the walk & I had very little time to get back home & make it to a scheduled appointment.  Now, this is not the part where we hail a cab & the dog & I go to the dentist’s but that is a picture in my mind that I am laughing at right now!

We walked very briskly home & then I got ready quickly to go to my appointment…yes to the dentist’s office.  Being in a hurry, I did not stop to change or take anything out of my pockets.  Yay, I arrived on time for my appointment for a cleaning.  The hygienist is a very competent, professional gal who does not chat a great deal.  The appointment was finished & I was just about to get up out of the reclined chair when the hygienist had a funny look come over her face & a “oh, what happened here?”  I looked down on the floor & there was a small pool/puddle of yellow liquid.  That got me laughing & laughing & I jokingly said to her that the appointment had made me so anxious that I must have had an accident.  Once I could stop laughing, I explained that I had put an orange juice box into my inside back hoodie pocket.  While leaning back in the chair, the box had obviously burst & then leaked down onto the floor.  I offered to clean the sticky mess up however the hygienist was so gracious & insisted that it was no trouble.   Clothes, the dental visit & humour do mix!

As an aside, in a little over a week, I am due to go back for my next dental cleaning appointment.  Some folks see the prudence of checking their pant pockets before putting them in the laundry & for this gal, I see the need for me to check my “secret” inside pockets before going to the dental office!

Hope we have shared a laugh today together!

Smiles, Saundie J

Happily, I have one qualified Endocrinologist who provides valuable & realistic guidance regarding my management of type 1 diabetes.  Add to that, a team of co-pilots at the Diabetes Centre who provide additional valued guidance. 

There seem to be a small group of folks that may appear to be “in training” for guiding in diabetes care that are concerned yet perhaps do not fully understand how diabetes works or how we may be feeling at certain times about hearing voluntary diabetes advice.  I am sure that I am not alone when I say that there are days when with diabetes or another “365” health challenge, you just do not want to discuss your health plan.  Please don’t get me wrong, I have unlimited enthusiasm & energy to advocate for JDRF or CDA or any positive diabetes related organization out there helping to improve the lives of those living with diabetes.  It is really the practiced patience that takes place surrounding folks who may or may not know me or another person with diabetes very well come up & say, “oh you ate too much sugar so you should stop” or “you should exercise more” or “you have got to cut stress out of your life for your own good”. 

If there is such a thing, I think I may be a wee bit of a feisty peacemaker.  My heart smiles to help others & build communities & offer kindness.  The feisty part comes in when I am passionate about something in life.  Parents understand this…you know the “mama bear” thing that we have to protect our children.  There are times I have found that needed the combination of “feisty peacemaking”.  Maybe we could call it respectful assertiveness but it is bigger than that I find.  I ask myself, do I want to make a choice to become agitated by the person who is likely offering their viewpoint out of care or do I want to make a different choice.  The answer is a resounding, make a choice to engage my passionate side…the one that educates folks one at a time if need be about what living with diabetes is really like.  It is replacing the misconceptions that still seem prevalent out there of “you ate too much sugar” or “oh you have diabetes so that means you can never eat sugar again”.  Well, for those of us with type 1, a hundred years ago that would have been half correct…meaning that you had to go on a starvation diet just to buy a few more months of life or if you were very lucky maybe you lived after diagnosis for a year or 2.  Thankfully, these are very different & inspiring & hopeful times that we live in today.

No, I did not eat too much sugar & did exercise & was an “energizer bunny” prior to diagnosis.  It is great news to know that I did not do anything at all to cause my diabetes.  It happened & I don’t ask myself why this happened to me either.  You know what I tell myself instead?  I say, it sure is great that if this disease has to exist that the diagnosis occurred after 1922.  Also, I say to myself, almost every single person has some type of struggle.  My choice is to make my diabetes inspire me & offer compassion to others whether they are being challenged with diabetes, another “365” health challenge or any other life challenge.  As a community, we can stand together to educate others so that the misconceptions can be replaced with the truth.  The misconceptions are like an ill-fitting, itchy hat…they have to go.  It takes time, passion & the willingness for us each in our own way to hold our heads up high & peacefully educate/correct perceptions of diabetes out there in the “ether”.  A mentor once told a group I was part of that “the mind is a fascinating machine that when fed small pieces of information then goes to work filling in the rest.”  The mentor went on to say that unfortunately, the “filled in “ information aka speculations become reality for people…they really believe the filled in information to be true.  Maybe this is what happened with diabetes information out there.  The great news is that there is an “antidote” for that & it is education with passion…I like to call it “education on fire!”

Oh, and by the way, I have a neat example of sharing diabetes wisdom in the form of dessert.  When I am invited to someone’s home & they say really from a kind heart, “oh you cannot have dessert, right.”  That is where the smile comes & this, “oh, I love dessert…tell you what, I will make it & bring it!”  Some people “say it with flowers”, yet I love to say it with “flour” …well & tea of course!

Be passionate, educate & say “bring the dessert” if that is your thing too!!

Smiles, Saundie J

When our second born son, Brian , was in junior kindergarten, he would bring home some of the funniest library books from school.  Brian has always had the best belly laugh & when he has “the giggles” to this day, it is a riot to listen to his laugh!  “Bri Guy” gets this sense of humour honestly since my Dear Heart Grandpa B & my Dad always had “joke files” & ready for a joke for all.  Humour shared with family & friends is a treasure & taking “myself a little more lightly” sometimes has been the prescription that is “just right”.

One day, Brian brought home one of the books from the “Froggy” book series.  I had never read one before & both Bri & I were instantly laughing with happy tears coming out of our eyes.  Those are the kind of laughs that are medicinal!  If you have not had the child-like enjoyment of reading a froggy book, they are usually about froggy & his memory challenges.  The book we read was about froggy trying to get dressed for a snowy day & each time froggy came outside he had forgotten to put on an article of clothing.  The friend outside would say, “froggy, you forgot your…”  The list went on & on for froggy of forgetting to put on a sweater, hat, gloves, etc.  Naturally, Bri & I found ourselves adding to the list & laughing those belly laughs.

At this point, you may be thinking…what in the world does a “froggy” story have to do with diabetes.  Glad you asked.  (ha! ha!)

Here comes the connection.  When I go on an “outing”, I try my best to prepare for the diabetes-related needs of the day.  My husband has on occasion joked that I suit up like diabetic Rambo for a walk & compliments me on my “suitcase” for picnics.  It is always said with a dear smile & a wink.  Even with great intentions of being organized for the “out & abouts”, the odd “froggy” event happens.  Two come to mind for me.  One time  I called home & said to Brian who picked up the phone, “Froggy, Mommy forgot her glucose meter.”  The funny part was that I was volunteering at a JDRF event.  It was not too far from our house so my husband was over with it in record time & a comment about me being “froggy”  & a smile & a wink & of course he could not resist adding…”I bet there are a few meters at this event anyhow.”  On a “Rambo walk”, I got all suited up with my walking belt full to the brim of necessary “stuff” for a long walk.  I was certain that I had every possible thing that I could want…my meter (check), fast acting sugar (check), water for the dog & I (check), cell phone (check…even charged), music (check), etc, etc.  Half way along the walk, I thought that I should check my glucose to see whether I needed to turn down my pump for the way back.  Aha, I sure had my meter however the lancet device was empty!  Thus, I lost my “Rambo Diabetic” “rank” within our household & received instead, a wink & a smile & of course…”froggy…you forgot”.

Although diabetes & other “365” challenges are not a laughing matter, I take myself lightly whenever possible because I have learned that a day without a laugh is like a day that the daylight did not come up!

Blessings for a non “froggy” diabetes day!!

Smiles, Saundie J

Lift That Fog!

Yesterday morning as I took our sons to school, there was a heavy fog all about us.  These are some of the days that are pretty cool.  We sometimes pretend that we are in an airplane & that the fog is instead all of us going through the clouds & then visiting a while amongst the clouds.  Another great foggy day happened a little over a week ago.  Being still a kid at heart, I wanted to turn the foggy drive that our youngest son & I had ahead of ourselves into an adventure.  We were heading up to my hometown to visit our family for a special celebration.  As we began our drive, it came to me…yes, it would be great to get wee Alex as close to the windmills as possible.  In my mind, it was a bit like a scene out of a Stephen King kind of drive that day being so close to the moving windmills…surrounded by about 30 or so of them at a time.  Of course, I did not share the Stephen King analogy with Alex since he is only 5.  He got a charge out of the way we wound through small villages feeling like we were more on a movie set than anywhere near civilization. 

We can decide whether life is an adventure by driving in the fog & turning it into something “cool” as Al says. Living in a fog is another story don’t you think?  There is that oft said phrase, “my brain is in a fog.”  That sure can feel true with diabetes.  There are times that thinking straight takes more than Olympic brain strength.  Those are the times I find when I am either in low blood sugar or very high blood sugar.  Here’s the thing though…sometimes, the “fog” is literally invisible.

Fog being invisible describes the feeling that many folks with diabetes share with one another or at least say silently to oneself.  Those invisible fogs are the times when we believe that we are “right in range”…you know that magical 5-8 glucose monitor reading range…but we are not!

That foggy day yesterday morning was just one of those exact days!  I woke up & got up super early.  It was a wonderful feeling waking up to just the sound of the clock beating, a little wag of our goldie’s tail & gentle sleeping that was still happening with all the boys in our home.  I started simmering soup & planning out the day & had even more energy than usual.  As I reached for my glucose meter, I felt confident that I was going to see a beautiful reading of say 6.5 or something close to that.  Well, was I surprised to see the number 12 looking back at me.  The point is that you just cannot be sure by “feeling great” that your blood sugars are in healthy range.  Had I not tested my glucose, the invisible fog would have continued.  Instead, I continued to feel great however gave myself an insulin pump correction & got on with the day. 

As a little aside, I asked myself why in the world the reading was that high this morning & realized that “timing is everything”.  Yesterday afternoon I had made chocolate mousse & we all enjoyed that for dessert last night.  I had a delayed dessert though & enjoyed my treat at 8:00pm.  A better choice in hindsight to have that particular treat is after lunch on a weekend.  That treat always seems to result in delayed release of sugars so the insulin does not “hit” at the “right time” so it “hit” while I was sleeping & caused my glucose reading to increase overnight.  For me it is better looking forward to have the treat mid-day since then, I can correct the later increase in glucose during the day instead of having high sugars throughout the night & have to face that number on the meter in the morning.  That is why timing is everything. 

The fog can be fun ,yet for this gal, I prefer to use my glucose meter to avoid the “invisible fog” .

Smiles, Saundie J  

19/11/2012 06:23

Most of us have had the  discussion about the over-stimulation of one’s mind these days.  With a background in sociology, I find topics like the speed of life today & the corresponding impact that it has on each person or  upon society as a whole fascinating.

For sure, there are some areas of each life that are more influenced by the need to go at a high speed.  It reminds me a little of drivers on the 400 series highways.  The maximum speed posted is 100 yet if one did go at 100kms/hour, how do you suppose that would be received by other drivers?  That is why I find that when it comes to the areas of life that I have greater choices over like home life, the speed posted  is as often as possible a gentler speed.

Each of us tend to  either happen upon or more actively  choose a role model to emulate.  It could be someone who outwardly appears to be successful & super busy. Could it be that society has placed more of a value on folks who declare  jam packed schedules?  It reminds me of a comedy that I was enjoying several months ago.  The comedians were doing a sketch & the super busy fellow in the clip was telling his assistant to "get someone on the phone & get me someone while I am waiting."  That is an extreme example yet I find that often comedy brings some of the things going on in society into perspective.    Perhaps, it is a person who is admired for achievements within the community.  There are a great number of people that I consider heroes & the example that they set is priceless.  Each every day hero that I admire most are very different just as they should be yet they share 2 things in common:  none of them say they are busy even though their schedules are well  filled (not full), and they carry with them an incredible aura of peace.

What got me thinking about all of this?  Soup! (Chicken soup to be more specific).  My whole family has been hit with this cold that is going around.  That is where the soup comes in.  I love to make homemade chicken soup for these instances.  It feels very comforting to make this for my Dear Hearts.  This soup takes time…at least simmering for a day or a day & a half.  Over the years, several people have been to our home while the soup is simmering & have said, “why don’t you just buy some soup from the store because it is faster?”  My reply is always the same.  I say with a smile, “ when I make the soup, there is lots of time to stir in extra love.” 

There are two lessons that my soup stirring teaches me each time about diabetes. First,  I know exactly what ingredients are going into the soup & that is great news because it makes carb counting a breeze.  Second, the soup making reminds me about valuing the wellness activities in  life.  It is about  making as many healthy choices as possible yet balancing this out with “treats” to look forward to.  It is taking time to listen when others are speaking & enjoying the chapter that they are sharing in their life story.    Finally, it is the peace in knowing that  hope is about today so keep stirring gently & enjoy the prensence of today's soup. In being present, the soup teaches me too that hope appears in the present each & every day & faith is about future "soup".  Today's soup is about the hope for a cure for diabetes & tomorrow's soup is about the faith that the cure will happen.

  May each of your days be filled with “soup”.  Smiles, Saundie J

18/11/2012 11:10

When Patience Takes Time

Last December, I reflected on 2011.   2012 with more patience on my part & learning the lesson (again) about having a bigger yes felt like it was going to be much more.    Looking forward, more discerning decisions about activities to say yes to & which ones to say no to were at the top of the “to do” list. 

During 2011, I realized that I had let my “bigger yes” activities become sacrificed because I had filled my schedule so full with other commitments.  It was not a great feeling knowing that I was responsible for how 2011 had unfolded, one decision at a time.  The reality though was that there was great news in seeing this.  That meant that better choices could be made for the coming year.  It is a little like when you download your glucose meter & the numbers speak volumes about what you have gone through in the last few weeks.  That is the opportunity to assess the numbers & make different decisions…life enhancing decisions regarding health.  The same can be said of one’s life choices whether they are spiritual or career related or family related…at least that is how it is in my life.

Here it is, November 2012…nearly one year later & it is a great feeling to be on “the right track”…not the perfect track, but on the right one, heading in the right direction.  Learning to say no to some activities was tough I found.  I love to say yes to everything yet that is not realistic & by saying no to some activities over the last several months, it has meant that I can now be involved in the activities that I am absolutely passionate about…my bigger yes.

Now for the patience piece…well ironically, learning to be more patient takes time.  Last December, I began by ordering a book on patience by M.J. Ryan.  Well, too funny…it was out of stock yet was advertised as being backordered for the next 3 months.  Okay, I thought to myself, that is irony at its finest.  About a month later, an email came through saying that the book was no longer at all available for sale.  Being tenacious, I then looked for one through second hand stores, the library & anywhere that I could think of.  Long story, cut short, it took 6 months to get the book.  I appreciated it even more once I got to read it.  Reading is one thing yet putting into practice greater patience is a work in progress.  Slowing down is a choice that is made daily yet over time it has lead to greater peace & more appreciation each & every day.

As far as diabetes goes, the patience & having a bigger yes have been incredibly valuable.  I no longer wait for a cure but rather participate in advocating more meaningfully in reaching out to others with the heart’s hope of building community not just within diabetes-related communities, but also in each & every circle that I get to be touched by.  It means that I expect a cure yet life is meant to be lived I think day by day, in the present & there is where the greatest appreciation, peace & hope are there waiting each morning.  May your bigger yes be huge!  Smiles, Saundie :)

16/11/2012 11:06

It is amazing the people out there in our families, circle of friends & communities that are fighting a battle of some sort.  Some folks share their challenges & others silently carry the battle that they are facing.  Passionately, I believe that none of us are meant to face any burden alone.  For that matter, what is a celebration on the other hand without at least one “true blue”. 

For the journey whether it be a challenge of diabetes or another of life’s challenges, there is nothing like a “battle buddy”.  What a difference these unsung heroes make to us all.  Perhaps for some folks, there is even a community of supporters along life’s journey that are there for one another.  It takes a while to build a community yet even if we have one battle buddy, it can make the difference between having an ok day or a great day…being understood & cared about.

Joyfully, I have a treasured “collection” of battle buddies.  Once I became more open with my circle, and took that step of being myself & letting folks know what would be helpful, it is like relationships became more real & rich.  It is comforting to absolutely know that there are folks that I know I could call day or night & they know the same is true of me for them.  You know what, that did not happen overnight & it took not only time, but also the choice to do 2 things:  be vulnerable to the possibility that not all folks you reach out to will be on the “battle buddy” team & secondly to ask for help from time to time.  It took a lot of years to learn how to do both of these things.  Personally, I love to serve others so having others help me felt pretty unnatural & uncomfortable.  Several friends over the years though have pointed out that friendship is a two way street.  It reminds me of a book I read about a year ago with the principle of 100-100.  It stuck with me as an awesome idea within relationships.  The principle is that within friendships that we each meet one another with 100% effort vs the stereo typed “meeting each other 50% of the way.”

Every day is a gift I feel.  The days that have the bow & the wrapping on them are the ones where I get to share a sense of “timeless” enjoyment with a “battle buddy”.  That is the gift that I gave myself this November.  For me, it is teatime “timelessness” with Dear Hearts that makes my heart smile.  Whatever you decide to treat yourself to this November & beyond, may you too feel within yourself the timeless care.  Smiles, Saundie :)

15/11/2012 12:25

How many folks with diabetes have had that experience of someone saying to them, "I could never inject myself?"  That statement could be referring to either an insulin needle taking say 4 times per day or infusion set that needs to be inserted every 3 days or even the task of poking those "10 little piggies" (fingers).

Although it has been 5 years of poking & injecting, I still remember the very first time that I had to do a blood glucose test.  Psychologically, it was one of those things that my mind kept saying, hey, this is tough to poke your own finger on purpose.  Many times, other folks with diabetes have shared with me that they were fearful of the sight of blood.  I could relate to that.  The thing was that I also had a fear of needles. 

Faced with the reality that in order to be as healthy as possible that poking & injecting was going to have to take place is something diabetes presents to each one of us.  The first couple of weeks, I remember thinking, how do people do this day after day & year after year.  After those couple of weeks, I made a decision.  I had a chat with myself & made a decision that I was going to find ways to go from that current thinking of "I cannot imagine this" to "I can & will do this" because it is worth it.  It was a decision that said too that diabetes was just a part of my life but sure was never going to take over my life.  It was a way of thinking that brought me towards the goal of getting my previous energy & positive attitude back.  Better than that, it was a decision that I would take steps to accept diabetes & live life with even more attitudinal energy. 

Going from "I could never" to "I can & do" took time.  Time in of itself however is not the answer I believe though.  Here's an example of what I mean by that... When I studied grief counselling, one of the statements contained in one of the study guides leapt out at me & you know what, it was an aha moment for me.  The statement was that time does not heal wounds, but rather action together with time heals wounds.  The author went on to illustrate this idea by giving the example of a person who has a car with a flat tire.  He stated that telling a person that time would make the tire re-inflate without action was absurd & he stated that the same is true of human healing. 

Even if the steps we each take that get us from "I could never" to "I can & I do" takes time, as long as there are positive action steps (sometimes they are baby steps), it is something worth celebrating.  Everyone is unique & each step will be different for each person.  What works for me may not be the answer for you yet there is something that is the "aha" for each of us.  May you be blessed too with your "aha".

Smiles, Saundie :)

Type 1 diabetes is a diagnosis that almost always occurs in children.  In our family, it is indeed a childhood disease  yet perhaps in a bit of an upside down & inside out way.  Being “mom” to 3 energetic boys is a treasured gift that I am entrusted with the grace of having to our beautiful boys.  On November 29^th, 2007, “mom” was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.  Being over 35 & having a diagnosis that is usually one associated with children was surprising especially since I had always been otherwise known as “the energetic bunny” & in great health. 

It turns out that in the last 5 years, I have very much learned that in our family, this is largely a childhood illness.  I mean, it is all in how it has affected our sons.  It is a balancing act at times determining  just how much “reality” at a time I want to expose the boys to.  Our oldest son though was 7 at the time & very aware that our lives had changed & he felt uncertain.  It was difficult to see this diagnosis affect him & it was up to me to not only say that everything would be okay but to live that way authentically. 

Our second born son was 3 at the time & although he was not totally aware of what was happening, I really believe that he too could sense the changes that had initially happened within our family.  The first year with T1D was challenging as I am certain it is for everyone in this situation.  It seems funny to look back now & remember vividly that when I had very sudden & pronounced vision difficulties & extreme tiredness & zero energy that I knew that I had diabetes before I even went to the doctor.  Over the years, I really believe that organizations like JDRF & CDA have done an amazing job of educating folks so much so that I had heard about the symptoms of diabetes way before I had T1D.  The thing was though that I had no idea of what this diagnosis would mean.  I remember thinking that all I would have to do is go to the doctors & have 1 insulin injection & then I would be all better & would simply get on with my life as if my body just needed a reset like you hard boot a computer.

Some dates stick in your mind in life & November 29^th is one of them for me.  T1D I have found has been more about my family than about me or at least that is how I look at it.  We have been on a journey yet it has strengthened us. 

It really has been just in the last 6-12 months that I have finally fully accepted that for now T1D is part of our lives as a family.  We don’t let it get in the way of our activities as a family.  In many ways, we have had more experiences of joy & adventure because we have learned to appreciate our blessings even more.  My thinking always was that the great news in life is that no matter what happens, we have a choice as to what to “do” about how we think, how our attitudes are shaped, our habits develop & ultimately how we live our lives.  T1D just enhances that belief that was always there for me & that’s a great thing.  Every morning, I feed my mind a healthy menu of uplifting quotes & I choose to surround myself as often as possible with people that are positive folks.  When I do the next right thing whether it be a food choice or exercising or reading inspirational books, attending motivational speaking engagements, or sharing time with lights in this life, it equals joy, diabetes or no diabetes.

For 4 years now, I have had the blessing of having an insulin pump.  I love, love, love it.  It does not mean that my blood sugars are always in a healthy range however it is the closest option right now to perform  the work of the pancreas.   The pump allows me to have spontaneity from day to day & that is a great thing!  It means that when just like everyone else, I get that inevitable cold, I can have a “chat” with my pancreas & increase the insulin & lower high blood sugars with the use of math.  Now math is not my favourite “sport” yet thankfully that is where my “co-pilot” enters beautifully into the picture.  That person is my husband who we refer to lovingly as the “mathlete”. 

One of the activities that absolutely makes my heart smile is reading with enthusiasm & humour to younger children.  I love it when they choose the book that they would like to share together & I always say to them, “that is one of my favourite books because it has a happy ending!”  That is how I feel about T1D…that the cure is the happy ending.  In the meanwhile, doing the next right thing & “feeding” ourselves with activities & thoughts that increase hope have proven to make a huge difference.  Christmas comes twice a year at least in my heart because, yes, it comes in December however it also comes in June too!  In June, our family has the honour of walking alongside all the everyday heroes at the Tellus JDRF Walk & the monumental hope that day provides is indescribable.  Having my sons & husband walk with me is the best feeling.  And I see all the other beautiful families & I cannot wait to celebrate when the cure happens alongside these everyday heroes!

And you know what, I don’t just wish for a cure, I expect one with heartfelt hope.  The cure would mean that the beautiful faces that I have had the honour to meet will be celebrating with their families & my boys, well, I will be celebrating the strength along the journey that they have given each & every day .  It would mean that “Mom” could then look into their beautiful brown eyes & say, there is some great news…