If you have type 1 diabetes or treat your diabetes with insulin, you may have also adopted the saying, “there are days when keeping blood sugars in range is like pinning jello to a tree on a humid day!”  On a humourous note, years ago I worked with a guy who insisted that no matter how full anyone was that everyone always has room for jello.  He was a jello-a-holic!  You may or may not enjoy jello yet pinning it to a tree you will likely admit is not a sport that many of us are going to succeed at!

We are all pretty familiar with the analogy of blood sugar fluctuations being equated to roller coaster rides.  Well, maybe not exactly like roller coaster rides.  Why?  We sure know that blood sugar coaster rides are precisely zero fun!  Blood sugar roller coaster rides are the type of ride that we cannot wait to see end.

Last weekend was one of those roller coaster ride weekends living with type 1 diabetes in our household.  Normally, when I am ill, I need a lot more insulin.  That is the usual trend.  I had caught a cold that had been donated by our local school.  Due to this, I was keeping a pretty close eye on my blood sugars to see when they were going to start to make the climb.  Strangely, this is the one time that for some mysterious reason, my sugars did not climb.  Since there was no blood sugar elevation, I left my settings on my insulin pump on “normal.”  On Saturday afternoon, I was wiped & had the opportunity to have a nap.  Once I woke up, it was time to start to make dinner.  I checked my glucose & I had a beautiful reading of 5.4 !  I felt thrilled.  Within 20 minutes though, I started to feel “wanky.”  Severe nausea set in & the shakes & it felt like it was 100 degrees F & man was I dizzy.  In the absence of something like a stomach bug, I had never felt so nauseous.  Well, yes, I remembered that in fact I had felt this nauseous once before. 

If you have type 1, then you may share this next feeling with me.  It was the thought of denial that a low blood sugar could be happening because I had tested just 20 minutes ago.  We may wonder how things can possibly change that quickly.  Despite the logical arguments going on in my mind, my “gut feeling” was that I needed to do another blood test.  Aha, sure enough, my “perfect” blood sugar had changed to a low blood sugar reading.  The strange thing though was that it was a 3.4 which usually for me is something that I can bounce it back without too much trouble with a glass of juice.  Fifteen minutes later, my glucose reading was going down even after the juice.  Long story cut short, I had to take 3 fast acting sugars to get myself back up to 4.5 blood sugar readings & over 30 minutes of time.  The other bizarre thing in the meantime was that the brutal nausea that was continuing for about an hour.  The voice of reason & common sense was then in the room in the form of my logical husband.  He reminded me that I had been having a very challenging time with a batch of test cartridges and that there was a distinct possibility that they are defective.  4 boxes in a row last week were only testing every 1 in 4 times.  My husband suggested to me that my 3.4 & maybe even my 5.4 were not accurate due to the strong likelihood that I had purchased a defective batch of strip cartridges unknowingly.  Now the extreme nausea made perfect sense.  If I am having a major low blood sugar, I get more & more clues from Mother Nature in the form of nausea, unbelievable shakes & the sweats.  Needless to say that I contacted the test strip company to advise them of what was happening & gave them the batch number.  There is no way that I would want anyone else going through this.

If you are someone that loves someone with insulin dependent diabetes, then you may be curious about what a severe low blood sugar feels like.  Everyone is exactly an original.  To share my experience with you, I would equate last Saturday’s low blood sugar feeling to one that even to this day is vivid in my memory & mind.  It was the one & only time that I had a hangover.  That was in first year university when my friends & I were getting gussied up for a formal party.  My girlfriends & I got it into our minds that it would be fun to mix up a batch of fuzzy navel drinks (you know peach snapps & orange juice).  After that, we got to the party & had some French wine.  There are 2 things that to this day I have never consumed again & they are peach snapps & French white wine!  Remember, I did not have diabetes at that time.  If I had, I would not have been drinking those beverages.  I was a “light weight” alchohol consumer from my earliest memory.  I did not have a great deal to drink that evening yet it sure did a number on me.  The next morning, I had my first & only hangover.  The nausea was brutal & the headache was memorable.  I decided that day that I never wanted to feel that way again.  And I hadn’t until last Saturday when I had those feelings again from the low blood sugars.  It goes without saying that I had not been drinking obviously.  It was like that hangover without the alcohol. Thankfully, within about an hour, those physical feelings went away unlike a hangover.  As an aside, I have only a glass of wine a handful of times a year.  I find that first of all that I simply do not desire alcohol together with the fact that I find that it can really either cause a high or a low blood sugar result & that to me is not going to add to my enjoyment. 

As we know, when we have type 1, what goes down must bounce back up again to the extreme.  That is exactly what happened to me 2 hours after the low blood sugar on Saturday.  I began to feel severely tired & tested my blood sugars.  A whooping 16.3 was staring back at me.  When this happens to us, none of us are amused by this roller coaster summit.  I think of it this way; the roller coaster that results from a low blood sugar  becomes like the bailing out of a boat with a massive hole in it!  I don’t know about you, but when I have a low that goes below 3, my liver starts spewing out sugars & I go into a ridiculous high blood sugar.  Then we have to watch the teeter totter to give just the right correction without overdoing or else we go low again & so on & so on.  The boat with a massive hole analogy is for me at least an accurate one.  With the low blood sugars I find that my liver delivers huge amounts of sugar into my bloodstream & my insulin cannot “bail” these sugars out at the rate that they are coming back in until I can get it “patched” hours later.  If we wonder what a ship’s caption & an amusement park operator have in common, it is type 1 diabetes!  (just in the analogy form)

We are sure to agree that none of us really want to be this type of ship’s caption or amusement park operator.  If we are going to ride any roller coasters, let’s enjoy one at one of our amusement parks like Disney World instead!  And hey, if there is going to be a massive hole in a boat, none of us want to be part of that either.

My heart’s hope for you is that the vast number of roller coasters & boat rides are the literal ones & filled with fun!

Smiles, Saundie :)

Enjoy your weekend & happy walking this Sunday to all the Dear Hearts walking in a JDRF Walk for the Cure this weekend!  Monday's sharing is entitled, "Jeepers Creepers, Thankful for the Peepers!"  :)

Do you like the carnival?  What are some of the favourite booths or amusing places that you frequented at a carnival?  Was it the midway?  Perhaps it was the bouncy house?  Could it have been the dunking tank?  When I think of carnivals that I enjoyed, certainly the rides & the goodies rate really high.  How about the bearded lady?  Do any actually exist?  The only time that I can remember a reference being made to a bearded lady was in one of the “Vacation” movies.  We would surmise that this is a fictional character.  How about if I tell you that one of my best friends is a “bearded lady?”

The bearded lady that I am honouring is our golden retriever, Beddy.  Beddy is the short form for the name, “Lady Bedford.”  Each time that our family becomes owned by a beloved golden retriever, the doggy receives a name relating to tea.  I love tea & I love golden retrievers.  It did not take long before “Lady Bedford” became “Beddy.”  First of all, it became evident early on that Beddy was not one for “airs & graces.”  She would much rather roll in the mud than most other activities.  She loves to pat her paw in her water dish & knock the water running all over the kitchen floor.  She is a down to earth “gal” who is the neighborhood/community social committee member of & the name Beddy fits her.  She will literally stop on a walk & sit down until anyone walking the other way stops to pat her & talk to her.  She loves people, that’s for sure!  You may have a dog or pet that you absolutely love too.  They become an instant part of your family & fill our lives & hearts in beautiful ways.

Have you read stories of our pets who act in the form of earthly angels to our human family?  They may be stories of a pet rescuing an owner from a lake or helping out in another medical alert fashion.  They are stories that remind us just how in tune to humans our furry friends are.  I love reading articles that describe how dogs help out family members who have chronic illnesses in life saving ways.  A number of months ago, I remember reading about dogs that are being trained to help out people living with insulin dependent diabetes.  In essence, the article described the training that the dogs go through to assist in alerting family members with diabetes when they are sustaining low blood sugar.  I remember smiling & thinking that sounded incredible.  After that, I did not think anything more of that.

Last Saturday night, I tested my blood sugar before bed as I always do.  My glucose tester indicated that I was in the range that I had set as a goal so I went off into dreamland contentedly.  At about 4am, our goldie insistently woke me up.  She always sleeps on the very comfy family room couch downstairs at night & we never hear a peep from her throughout the night.  In the wee hours of the morning though, Beddy kept prompting me to get up.  She had come upstairs & into our room & would not take no for an answer.  Finally, I stirred.  At first I thought perhaps she needed to go outside but instead she jumped up onto the bed & curled up with me & kept nosing me awake insistently.  It was strange & something that she had not done before.  Since I was awake anyhow, I was guided to do a blood test.  Yikes, my glucose was at 2.8 & I had no idea that I was in a low!  I was able to treat the low & get my blood sugars back into safe territory again.  Our furry friend stayed until I reached 5.6 on my glucose meter almost like she somehow knew that it was safe to return to her comfy couch again in the family room.  It felt kind of mysterious yet I realized then just as I believe now that not only are there guardian angels, but they sometimes have assistants who are earthly angels of sorts.  Sometimes, even angels have beards!

My heart’s hope for you is that you do not need the help of a “bearded friend” due to low blood sugar.  May you always feel the presence of your guardian angel & the love that is shared.

Smiles, Saundie :)

Wishing you a week of friendship...bearded or otherwise & Friday's sharing is entitled, "It's Like Pinning Jello to a Tree!"  :)

Most of us will agree that when we or a loved one is diagnosed with either diabetes or another 365 health challenge, one of the first questions we may tend to ask is, “why me?”  It may take very little time to come to the conclusion that there is no obvious reason to this question.  Here’s the thing though, have you found that you have gotten to that place in your mind & heart & self that answers that question with, “I don’t know & I don’t need the answer anymore?”

One of the things that I found along the way to the “I don’t know & I am okay with that” is doing something “with” diabetes to give it meaning or even make life so much huger than anything that diabetes could touch in my life.  It has taken time to get to that point & it has taken major effort physically, emotionally & spiritually.  Honestly, the physical side of diabetes was for me the easier of the three.  It was learning the best care regime to work with my body.  Sometimes, I have success with the regime & other times I don’t.  Either way, I try as much as possible to treat that part as the going through the motions part.  I try not to treat glucose tests & A1C results as final exams & renewal application forms for my pump & supplies as huge deals.  Most of the time, I take it in stride.  We are human & we do our best with the physical side of a disease that seems to have a moving target attached to it.  When I look at glucose results, if I have gone through all the possibilities for why that number on my meter looks weird & I still don’t “get it”, then I realize that I have done my best & I don’t scold myself over it. 

There are such a myriad of ways that we each get to choose to give our lives original meaning or make the difference that we are meant to make in the world.  The “way” will look different for each of us understandably.  Do you wonder though if even though each of us will make our own path of difference in the world that diabetes magnifies that?  Do you also believe that we really live our difference through acts of service?  Over the years, I have found that there is nothing quite as wonderful as the feeling of reaching out to others & doing something to hopefully let them know that someone else cares about them.  Whether people have physical challenges or not, most people do have struggles within their lives.  There is nothing like that feeling of knowing that others care about us.  Why would we know this & not want to share our own way of caring for others?  There are so many organizations that welcome volunteers who offer genuine compassion & care.  The ways that we share of ourselves is unlimited.  There is a quote by Erma Bombeck that is the motto of my heart & it is:  “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, I used everything you gave me.”  What is the motto of your heart?  If you don’t know what it is, then you have a priceless gift yet to give yourself.  Once you have a heart’s motto, you just may have the beginning point to go out there & give something of care to others in your own beautiful way. 

You are very likely to find that the exact way that you are meant to share & make a difference comes to you so gently & vividly.  That is what I have found over the years.  Over the years, there have been a diverse gift of opportunities to give of myself.  The organizations have changed at times over the years yet the continuation of reaching out in service will continue until my final breath.  Once I was diagnosed with type 1, I found that my heart was even more filled with the need to reach out to others.  The best part is that I found that in going through my own struggles that it made me more present with people & more enthusiastically myself in caring for others.  My empathy increased exponentially as I listened to struggles that others were facing. 

It is no secret that I was given a profoundly sentimental heart.  I try to balance that out with the humour that I find deeply healing as well.  Without the humourous side in my life, I think I would be a pretty intense person for many people’s taste.  Sometimes, we cry with others, or give hope through action or words (hopefully both), or understanding & yes humour when that is exactly right.  Stir that all together with love & that can send a ripple of care within the world that may not have been there before.

Okay, diabetes is here, yet I have found something to do “with” that.  The question does not need an answer of why it is here.  To turn diabetes into heartfelt compassion & care for others is something that we each get to choose.

My heart’s hope for you is that when you reflect upon the quote below that you answer these questions with an enthusiastic, “Yes!”

“At the end of the day, the only questions I will ask myself are….Did I love enough”  Did I laugh enough?  Did I make a difference?”

Smiles, Saundie :)

May you touch countless lives this weekend & Monday's sharing is entitled, "Ode to the Bearded Lady."  :) 

Smiles to all the Everyday Heroes Walking for Chapters of JDRF for the Cure on June 9th...we will be smiling with hope for all of our type 1 families throughout the whole world as our family of 6 walks too :)

Are you still wearing the fashions that you wore 20 years ago?  The funny thing is that with the oft said phrase, “what is old is new again” may mean that you have just answered yes to this question.  A couple of years ago, while out for coffee, a complete stranger came up to me & said that they liked my haircut because they said it was just like “Marsha Brady’s.”  That was a bit of a laugh because that sure was not at all what I had been going for yet it was a wee trip down memory lane.  Clothes & hair styles & music can to a certain degree go out of style.  That does not really bother me.  If I like something, then I am pretty loyal to the style whether it is current or not.  And to top it off, with diabetes, functionality in clothing especially plays a part.  If for instance something has either hidden pockets or a lot of pockets, it is likely going to be pretty useful.  If you too have type 1 diabetes & are a “pumper”, you may have a similar viewpoint.  It is kind of neat when we can be “hands free” when we go out.  As often as possible, it is nice to not have to carry what resembles a suitcase for our diabetes supplies.  I challenge myself to find the smallest “vessel” for carrying supplies.  It is just a “quirk” that I have & it makes me laugh with myself.  Anything that we can laugh at seems medicinal, don’t you think?

The things that are timeless & don’t ever go out of style are not things at all, don’t you find?  I am referring to choosing to live an intentional life of magnanimous actions & gratitude.  For sure, I am not suggesting that we “put on” these traits or characteristics.  It is instead an intentional, genuine choice to be pulled in the direction of kindness & gratitude.  In sharing time with other folks with either type 1 diabetes or other 365 challenges, time & time again, we share with one another that since being diagnosed that we tend to feel a sense of magnification.   It may be in the knowing that we are faced with a health challenge that we have to take care of & that the consequence of not looking after oneself can be devastating.  Health is looked at in a different way once you have a 365 health challenge, don’t you think?  The days when we feel really well are appreciated in a magnified way.  I have even found that I want to jam pack more into my life because I actually cherish life more since my diagnosis of just over 5 years ago.  I don’t compare my life to folks who do not have health struggles intentionally.  None of us wish a health struggle on anyone.  There are certainly times where you & I may share our frustration of some of the views that folks without our health struggle articulate that are at times ignorant or bordering on mean-spirited.  Thankfully, there are some amazing groups that we can join to decompress when this happens.  My favourite ways to decompress within a couple of type 1 diabetes groups that I am fortunate enough to belong within are: humour & honesty.  Being able to share our feelings & have that understanding within these groups is priceless.  And the unique humour can really add to our sense of belonging  & moving on.  Thankfully, we each hopefully also have many battle buddies & dear hearts that, although they do not have diabetes or another 365 challenge, just “get it.”  How great is that!

The words that never go out of style in my mind are “please” and “thank-you.”  If we don’t as a society “accessorize” with these two words then we just may be journeying away from the most desirable styles available. Just like putting on either the latest fashion clothing or make-up or earrings, the words please & thank-you are choices that we get to make every day.  We can choose to “not leave home without them.”  The coolest people that I know are people that have genuine manners & heartfelt care for others.  Now that’s timeless “fashion!”

This morning, I found myself as always waking up & saying 2 things to myself:  “today is not about you, Saundie” & “time to make a list of gratitudes.”  Here’s the thing that I have found & that is with these 2 daily thoughts, it helps keep me on track.  First of all, it could become easy to at times feel badly for oneself especially when health challenges are present.  When my focus is on thinking of others, I just naturally am filled with more gratitude or the rock of remembering what is most important in a given day & in a lifetime.  This morning, I woke up & was feeling especially unwell.  There seems to be a cold virus going around the school that our boys attend.  All three of our sons got the cold last week.  Today, I woke up with it too.  On top of that, I have a chronic G.I. challenge that decided to really act up as well as tendonitis that had been “behaving itself” for quite a while.  Do you know that feeling when you are driving on a winter’s day in Ontario & you really have to concentrate even more on your driving due to the weather conditions?  Today was kind a parallel in the mind perspective of that analogy.  When I feel pretty well then it is kind of like the “drive” is almost unmemorable.  In other words, the waking up & thinking these 2 thoughts of:  today is about being kind to others & being thankful are like “cruise control” or automatic when I feel fairly well.  It is on the days like today, that additional concentration is required because just like driving on a winter’s day, I also don’t want my attitude to end up in the “ditch.”  And the best part is that just like with driving experience, with experience with type 1, I anticipate that there will be days like today.  So, I have my “snow tires” on.  I hang onto the wheel with both hands in terms of my thinking & attitude on days like today.  It is like turning the vehicle around.  It takes intention & attitude is a lot like that too I think.  This morning, my gratitudes won big time over any possible “poor me” thinking.  Today, I declared that it would be a jammie day.  Ahh, the comfie Snoopy jammies kind of make me smile so they became the uniform of choice.  So I appreciated the Snoopy jammies & that a tummy comforting food was already prepared & that although I would have to cancel some plans for the day that I could replace these with other enjoyable activities.  As an aside, each week, I make up 2 blender-filled homemade fruit smoothies & then put the contents into mason jars & freeze them.  That way, when it is time for breakfast, I have it all ready & it seems to sit well on even an upset tummy.  When we aren’t feeling well, it is especially great to have already made some comfort food for ourselves.  I try to usually have both the smoothies in the freezer as well as homemade chicken soup for our family.  Today, I am appreciating these foods even more.  It is like caring for ourselves in advance! 

A number of ladies in our geographic area will remember this past Mother’s Day.  Many moms commented in conversation recently that the weather was awful that day & that took away from their enjoyment of the day.  I did not share that viewpoint.  Sure, there was hail & it was freezing cold.  When I saw that the day was going to be like that, I was excited to finish a book that  a friend had leant me & also I got the rare treat of “being in charge of the tv remote.”  It was relaxing watching some movies that I had been saving up for that day.  It was a day filled with simple pleasures & I feel thankful to have enjoyed that day surrounded with my husband & sons.

Every morning, I get a blast out of our golden retriever.  She is a character!  It does not matter who feeds her in the morning, the result is always the same.  It is too funny to see her always thank the person in the room who did not feed her!  The best part though is that in the 3 years that our furry gal has been part of our family, she has always thanked someone for feeding her & all this without words!  That always reminds me that if a beautiful creature who does not have the capacity for words is able to show her gratitude, imagine the possibilities for people!

My heart’s hope for you is that every single day you have a way to steer your way to the people & thoughts that fill your heart with gratitude.

Smiles, Saundie :)

May your week ahead be filled with countless treasured moments of gratitude & Friday's sharing is entitled, "The Answer & the Question."  :)

If you are a parent or are a babysitter, then you may have had the enjoyment of watching one of the movies in the “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” series.  My husband & I were surprised in a great way when we watched the first movie in the series with our 3 sons. 

Do you find that what can often cause movies to entice our laughter is the mere fact that many are based on real life experiences?  As an aside, every single year just days before Christmas, our family sits down to a laughfest that is delivered by the movie, “Christmas Vacation!”  We may realize that the parts of the movie that we find so hilarious are the ones based upon what is happening either within our families or families around us.  Do we recognize within the cast of characters within the film anyone that behaves in a similar fashion?  We each get to answer that question for ourselves & in a spirit of kind laughter.  That movie is medicinal during the super stressful Christmas season we find.  The thing with holiday seasons is that if we have diabetes that it is a lot like balancing “the fish in the pot” in a Seuss-like fashion.  Man, having some humour during those times is a priceless gift that we can give ourselves!  My Dad has had a joke file from my earliest childhood recollection.  Dad is both humourous, inspirational & kind & I love & admire my Dear Heart Dad.  It was such wonderful timing when the re-make of the film, “Father of the Bride” was released in the movie theatres right before my husband’s & my wedding.  It was such a stress-buster, perspective creator at the time.  My Dad instantly took on the persona of the character “Fronc” & he lightened up the environment throughout the months leading up to “the big day.”  Our Father/Daughter dance at the wedding was even from the music from that movie & not at all your traditional dance choice with the tempo being fast & full of laughter.  It was so “just right” though because I was given an over the top sentimental heart & so having a traditional song with sentimental lyrics in it would have surely resulted in me being one mascara melted mess!  Dad knew that.  He is an everyday hero & I love him higher than Heaven.

Okay, back to the present day.  Our sons laughed like hyenas when they watched one of the scenes of the first in the “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” series.  The scene was of the mom in the movie who naively came up with the idea of giving the 2 older brothers “Mom bucks” to spend time together in relationship building activities.  The reason why our sons broke out in laughter as they pointed to me was because about 6 months prior to that, I had come out with an idea that we implemented in our home called “I caught you doing something right.”  My thought was that there is plenty of “opportunity” out there for our human family to sustain criticism.  The thing lacking I believed (& still do) is encouragement or celebration of what others are “doing right.”  My idea within our family had been to ensure that the boys could concretely see that when they behaved in positive ways that they received the “I caught you doing something right” cards instantly.  Although the boys laughed & laughed when they saw the mom in the movie doing something similar although magnified, our sons were pretty happy with the outcome of our “I caught you doing something right” cards.  We made up a little chart of how to achieve the cards & what x number of cards represented in terms of “goodies.”  The idea even evolved & the boys are really into it.

The idea of “I caught you doing something right” & the rewards or natural consequences is a fairly basic one.  It may even be perceived as a bit “hokey” yet it is a wee reminder to us as adults to remember to appreciate those around us.  We can even remember to appreciate ourselves & those closest to us.  Sometimes it is easier to see the great deeds that either acquaintances or strangers are doing within community groups or communities.  Sometimes it is easier to appreciate those people close to us & sometimes it is easier to have automatic gratitude towards those that are acquaintances or strangers.  Gratitude though without expression is a missed opportunity I feel.  We might just “make someone’s day” by simply sharing a few words of gratitude with that person. 

If we have diabetes or another 365 challenge, we may find that we have additional people in our lives that we can go ahead & show gratitude towards as we “catch these folks doing something right.”  It could be something as small as someone letting us go ahead in the grocery store line when they see us with 1 small carton of juice when we have a sudden episode of hypoglycemia.  It could be a smile, a hand on ours as well in another setting.  It could be someone telling us a joke to make us laugh & lift our spirits or lend us a book that they think we would find inspirational.  It could be an unsung hero that quietly finds ways to help out just out of love.  There are countless people that I find to thank for things big & small that have lightened the load of diabetes.  Although I thank them for the kind deed, I don’t often get into the diabetes piece.  Let’s face it, whether we articulate it or not, diabetes has a way of “flaring up” by giving us the “high numbers” on our glucose meters when we are involved in stressful moments throughout the day.  Anyone that helps out with lessoning the load or caring is a person that I feel I have caught doing something super right!  For several weeks, my husband & I have had the blessing of journeying along with a community group each week on a spiritual adventure.  Finding the humour within diabetes, it may not surprise you to learn that I have always loved to bake for loved ones.  I find that it is the only way to stir in the love to share with Dear Hearts.  With this group, I love to stir in the love.  This is an extraordinary group of Dear Hearts that are filled with love & grace & welcome & care & generosity.  Each week someone tries to clandestinely bring something either in the form of treats for the group or cards or information to share.  I hope to always catch these Dear Hearts “doing something right” & really give them my heart’s gratitude.  What they do makes such a difference to all of us.  I know that these Dears do not do anything for the sake of praise.  They do what they do out of love & kindness.  It makes it all the more natural & necessary to return this love right back to them.  Don’t you think that love is actually the best & most important “recycling program” out there?  I do.

My heart’s hope for you is that you find infinite ways to thank the Dear Hearts in your life for making a difference whether you have diabetes or another 365 challenge.  If we call it a “caught you doing something right” idea, that’s fine.  If we call it something else, that’s fine too.  The best part is that we get to return the love that others give in a way that makes our hearts and theirs smile.

Smiles, Saundie :)

May your weekend be filled with a thousand "hokey" moments that fill up your heart & Monday's sharing is entitled, "Timeless & Never Goes Out of Style." :)

When you were a kid, did anyone jokingly ask you whether zebras have black stripes on a white background or the other way around?  Did you ponder it for long or shrug that question off immediately with a laugh?  Some parts of life may remain a mystery.  One aspect of life’s journey that you may have discovered over time is that many chapters contain marathons of sorts.

Some appear in the form of mini or half marathons & others are definitely full marathons.  Some of the full marathons that we each face may at times become overwhelming at least for a while.  We may give ourselves some form of “rehydration” in the forms of either sharing time with Dear Hearts that help us refuel or participating in energy rebuilding activities that we love.  The best part is to know ahead of time that we are going to need to give this to ourselves from time to time whether we have a “365” challenge or not. 

It can be ironic at times when a life event begins to parallel something more of imagery that is happening within our minds or thoughts.  To share with you, this exact thing is happening in my life right now.  Over & over again recently, the same thought has recycled its way through my thoughts & that is, “man, this diabetes thing is a marathon & not a sprint!”  Countless times, diabetes has tried to knock me on my butt over the years.  It never gets the last word & never will.  I hope you find yourself feeling that way too towards either diabetes or any other life challenge.  Are you a procrastinator?  I tend to not be a procrastinator about almost everything.  The more undesirable the task, the more frankly I just want to get it over with so that I don’t have to think about it anymore.  It turns out though that I learned something about myself & that is that every once in a while diabetes tries to convince me to procrastinate about activities that are very enjoyable & would be great choices to participate in.  What’s that all about?  Has this happened to you too?  It is like we are participating in an ongoing marathon called diabetes (until the cure is found) & along the way, we can get tired.  What do we tend to do when we get tired out from the “diabetes marathon”?  Each one of us will have a different answer.  It is human to become tired out from any type of marathon in life.  The part that we may find that gives us strength is that the periods of needing to take a break to recharge help us to get back into the race again with even greater strength & determination.  That’s the human spirit!  Even though we cannot take “time off” from diabetes, we can choose to relax our schedules & create opportunities to do activities with people that help us to rebuild our strength.  Maybe we could equate that to stretching before exercise.  We may have completed years of a marathon with diabetes & we just need at times to admit to a battle buddy that we need care. 

Here’s the thing though & that is that when we are most tired, we may find it harder than ever to ask for support or engage in the activities that are going to help us get back to full strength for the journey again.  Recognizing that this is something that could happen is helpful I find.  We can realize it instantly when it happens & have a plan in place for this exact detour.  When we are feeling strong, we can choose to write down the plan & keep it in a spot for reference in the future.  One thing that is priceless I find is to have at least one battle buddy that you know you will share instantly that you are “tired out from the marathon.”  That battle buddy is the person that will extend his or her hand & heart & find a way to encourage us to give ourselves the specific things that we need at those times.  If the person is loving & tenacious, that may be a winning combination.  I have called on several battle buddies on the days when for some reason I seem reluctant to do the exact things that I need to do to get my strength back again.  My heart’s hope is that you have a battle buddy or several that you can call upon day or night to help you up if you stumble & gently guide you in finding your way again.  The great part is that it is a 100%& 100% relationship that we have with our battle buddies.  That means that we each give one another 100% of our care because we love one another.  A battle buddy is not someone that we call upon & drain his or her reserves but rather a Dear Heart that we love and are great friends to as well. 

Recently, I had one of those times when I found myself procrastinating about something that I love participating in.  I love the families involved in the activity & the activity itself & the social aspect & the hope that the day always brings.  The activity that I had put off was in registering for our upcoming JDRF chapter walk.  Maybe you go through times too where you kind of don’t want to think or say the word diabetes for a time.  If only we could put diabetes on a time out.  (smiles)  One of my battle buddies has been gracefully waiting kind of in the stands to see if any acts of encouragement would be helpful.  This particular Dear Heart (my husband) though has a great way of knowing when to watch from a distance & when to take my hand during rest breaks. 

Battle buddies have a way of touching our hearts in ways that are indescribable.  Late last week a wee package came in the mail as a complete surprise.  As I opened it up, my heart felt so warmed & I felt love through the mail, across the country.  Contained within the package was a beautiful blue charm set for my purse.  I love, love, love the colour blue.  It makes it pretty great as an aside that the type 1 colours are blue & white since they are a favourite combination of colours.  There are blue & white beads, a butterfly & a cure ribbon on the charm set.  On the other side of Canada, my Dear Heart cousin, Di had been preparing a surprise of “Mission Impossible” means.  Di, behind the scenes somehow found out that I had been admiring the charm set & surprised me.  As I gazed upon the delicate butterfly, ah, there it was, the hope that that beautiful creature of Mother Nature represents.  Then, as I held the cure charm, my heart was filled with that indescribable feeling of realization that I never have been nor never will be alone on this “diabetes marathon.”  My Dear Heart Di so vividly showed me this in a way that touched my heart beyond words.  Next, I shared with my Dear Heart how she had made my heart smile.  After that, I went to my computer & got registered for our chapter walk.  Di, you inspire & inspired me Dear Heart & I love you higher than Heaven!

My heart’s hope for you is that you know with all your being that although you are on a marathon that you are never alone & never will be. 

Smiles, Saundie :)

Wishing you a delightful week.  This past weekend was full of firecrackers (for Victoria Day) & a Dr. Who marathon for the boys who live here lol.  This Friday, the sharing is entitled, "Well, It's "Hokey" Yet That's It."    :)

If you love an engineer or know someone who loves an engineer, then you may have laughed at some point at the short clip called, “The knack.”  Essentially, it is a cartoon (Dilbert) that paints the scene of a mom bringing her young son into the doctor’s office.  The mom explains many symptoms to the doctor regarding observed behaviours displayed by her son.  The traits described by the mom are all comical.   Near the end of the cartoon, the young son has taken I believe the doctor’s photocopier apart & enhanced it.  The doctor finally tells the mom that he is afraid that the son has “the knack.”  “The knack” is the news that the son is going to be an engineer.  It is a hoot.  You may enjoy looking it up on-line & watching it for a giggle especially if you have a Dear Heart engineer in your heart & life.

Life is funny sometimes because over the years I have found that I have had to not only recall former math skills, but also enhance them.  Some of this has happened naturally & some by self-force.  Humbly, I will share with you that I was repelled by math by about grade 11.  By grade 12, I remember telling my then boyfriend (now husband) that I had enough math to get by in life.  My assertion was that I was really not going to need any more math because my plan was to go into the social sciences/counseling field.  My husband gave me a look that spoke volumes…you may know the one…the one that says without words that in time I would come to my senses. 

Yes, it took a wee bit of time, but sure enough, it became abundantly clear that math was here to stay in my life.  It made itself into life in countless ways but none so neon as when my life depended on it.  If you have type 1 diabetes, you may agree that our lives depend on solid math skills too.  Although we have insulin pumps, we are still very much the brains or math behind the machine.  We have to factor in things like exercise & stress & colds or other illness to name a few.  We learn terms like “stacking” & to avoid that again for safety & math reasons. 

Frankly, I am still not crazy about math but I have built up a tolerance for it.  For sure, my unique abilities do not go anywhere near “the knack” yet especially for the past 5 years, I have learned to appreciate math.

Have you ever thought about what kindness exponentials might look like?  There are tremendous examples of every day kindnesses in the world.  The magic is being fully present to appreciate these kindness gifts.  Over &  over again we hear that “it is in the little things that our hearts cherish most.” 

We all have those days or weeks or times in our lives where we are running in what seems like many directions.  Last week was one of those weeks for us in our family.  There was a very special celebration to prepare for & my heart wanted to do everything possible to contribute to our oldest son seeing how celebrated he is.  As I ran out the door one morning, I realized that I had not tracked my medication properly & had run out of one of my meds.  That is unusual because I usually inventory these.  Drat, this meant that I would have to get over to the pharmacy on the double.  Our pharmacist is one of the most caring, genuinely wonderful people.  She has jumped through hoops to obtain pump supplies for me from the States over & over again.  I am her only “pumper” so she has to place a special order each time for 1 box of insulin pump supplies.  I always thank her & appreciate her.  As I arrived at the pharmacy, I explained to the pharmacist that I needed to place an order for a medication that they stock thankfully & that I had run out.  What I did not realize though was that I had forgotten my repeat prescription which was still under a magnet on our refrigerator.  Creatively & caringly, the pharmacist solved the problem instantly.  It was not just that she did this, but it was in the “how” she did it that warmed my heart.  I hope you have had these moments of being warmed by kindnesses too.  My usual mere thank you ever so much just would not suffice.  The words came straight from my heart as I said, “you are the face of love.”

This morning was the dreaded morning of the blood lab appointment to test for A1C.  As often as I have made this trip to the lab, it does not get much easier.  Sometimes, there is a particularly painful experience with the testing & like many folks with diabetes, my skin bruises easily & is slow to heal.  Sometimes, my forearm looks like I have had a sports injury the next day after a lab visit.  This morning, I had a virtually pain free test.  I looked the lab tech in the eyes & from my heart  thanked her & shared with her how much I appreciated her technique.  I have never had such a pain free blood lab experience.  She smiled from ear to ear.  Her smile is with me still.

These are  just two examples of countless ones.  We all have those days where we are a little off our day & to have a heartfelt act of kindness or compassion makes all the difference in the world.

The best part is when we make the opportunity to thank others from our hearts.  It fills us up with such gratitude.  Have you found too that when you have received an act of love that it spills over & you cannot help but share that with others?  It truly only does take one ripple of kindness to create ongoing love in the world.  It can start with someone else and or it can begin with us.  Or, perhaps, we are neither the beginning nor the middle…it could be that the ripple of kindness or love has been here all along & sometimes we see it or feel it or appreciate it & other times we do not.  Either way, love & kindness are exponential.  Now that part of math, it absolutely awesome!

My heart’s hope for you is that you feel exponentially loved & cared about & you too are the source of this for Dear Hearts in the world.

Smiles, Saundie :)

Happy Victoria Day Weekend & Monday's sharing is entitled, "What Colour Are the Stripes Again?"  :)

Isn’t it great that within an hour or two, we have the ability to affect the rest of our day? Perhaps, you have found that even less time is needed to do this for you on given days.   Some folks may use the phrase, “better days ahead” or “tomorrow is a new day” when they experience an “off” day.  When we have those inevitable days where we just “don’t feel quite like ourselves”, we get to ask ourselves if we want to choose to “write the whole day off” or choose an alternative thought & action to that position.

Have you found that from time to time, you simply wake up in either not so upbeat a mood or a feeling of melancholy that you cannot immediately put your finger on the cause of?  Although I find that this does not happen often to me, that it does happen from time to time. 

This morning was one of those rare days that I woke up in one “of those off” moods.  Like many people, once I realized that I was not quite feeling like myself, I asked myself why that would be.  It did not make sense.  Here it was a beautiful sunny morning with above season temperatures.  Are you naturally “a morning person?”  Well, I will share with you that I sure am.  Spring is my second favourite time of the year since there is the new life & growth in plant life outside.  Today was especially gorgeous out since the cherry trees right outside our kitchen window were in blossom this morning.  Still though, even that did not seem to lift a low feeling this morning.  Finally, I realized that there were at least 2 possible reasons why this cloudy feeling was there this morning.  One reason that I came up with was that for the past few weeks, I have increased my level of commitments in the community & was feeling wiped out.  It was a good kind of wiped out though since I had been participating in things that I absolutely love with people that I love profoundly.  Still though, sometimes our bodies give us signs & signals that it is time for a rest break even if it is for just a short time.  The other possibility though I realized quickly was that sometimes there really is no reason that we can see for “off days.”  Sometimes, parts of life are a mystery & so too are feelings.  And sometimes that explanation is just fine I find in my life.  Today was one of the days that the second explanation seemed to fit & I soon realized that although it does not feel great for any of us to have an “off day” that it is understandable & human & okay.

Do you find that you too realize as well though that just because we may wake up in an “off mood” that we can choose to do something about that to salvage the day if we really set our minds to doing this?  I am not too much of a fan of kind of writing the whole day off & accepting that it is going to be one “of those days.”  That is not my go to position.  Rather, I find that it is so encouraging to have an idea in advance for what we each find to be soothing to us & give that to ourselves.  This morning, I knew instantly that what would work wonders on getting out of the “funk” was a walk in nature with our furry gal.  Isn’t it great when we find the thing or activity that works for each one of us?  Have you thought about what you find works wonders for you if you find yourself in a “blue mood?”  It may be a walk or a swim, run, an uplifting book, music or sharing time with a friend.  Do you give yourself that gift when you have that “off day?”  My heart hopes so.  You know what, I really did not feel like going for a walk even though I knew that it has worked wonders every single time in offering brand new perspective & lifting “off moods.”  I don’t know if this happens to you as well on the occasions when you are having an “off day.”  The great part though is that we don’t have to choose to listen to the voice within ourselves that says, oh don’t bother ‘cause it is just going to be one of those days.  We get to press through that voice to instead give ourselves what we need. 

Often, I find that if at any given time in the day that I am not feeling like myself that my go to thought is that it must have something to do with diabetes.  Many times that is a true connection for me I have found.  There are parallel feelings that I tend to have when my blood sugars are too high or too low.  Those are times when I take extra glucose tests.  This morning, I reached for my glucose meter to check to see if diabetes was the culprit for the “off mood.”  Hmm, no, it was not since my sugars were in range.  Sometimes, moods don’t seem to be connected to diabetes.  Those are times that I remind myself that I had “off days” even before diabetes.  Diabetes is not always the “fall guy.”  Sometimes, we can just chalk it up to having the full range of human emotions. 

This morning, I made myself go for an extra long walk.  As I was leaving the house, I said to my husband that I wanted to make sure that I got going on the walk as soon as possible since I did not want to “share” this off mood with anyone.  I also said that I wanted to be totally alone.  That is rare for me.  Life is funny too though because sometimes we think we are so much in control of what we think we want or need & then there is another outcome & we realize that the outcome that happened was so much better than we had planned.  This morning I ran into more people than usual on the walk.  As I said hello to folks, many folks stopped to chat for a few minutes.  One chat really put it all in perspective.  The lady said to me as she patted our goldie, that “dogs just get life.”  She went on to say that they  teach us so much like being naturally kind with others, unconditional love, being happy and taking pleasure in simple things like a walk, and things like that.  Then it hit me that before I had gone on the walk that one of the things that my mind tried to tell me was that there was no point in going for a walk this morning because I was not in a great mood & that going would be complicated.  Why complicated?  Well, if you have type 1 diabetes too, then you & I both know that we don’t just grab our sneakers & go out the door.  We have to test our blood sugars & figure out what we are going to need to take with us.  You & I are likely going to need to pack a small suitcase practically for a simple walk!  We will need:  our glucose tester, hopefully a cell phone, a fast acting sugar, a slow acting sugar, a reasonable amount of insulin if we are pumping & we will have to do some math to figure out if we need to turn the basal rate down on our pumps for the exercise.  Most days it is like second nature to grab all these things without thinking much about it but if we are having an off day then we can feel pretty cheezed off about how diabetes complicates a simple walk.  The thing that I realized though when I was talking to the lady is that the walk was so worth it.  Once I was out the door, the walk became medicinal.  Maybe it is those endorphins that kick in with exercise combined with the beauty of a walk through the woods & then on to the lake.  The half way mark of the walk provided an opportunity for a shift in thought & to the day.  My focus was then on the simple pleasures of nature & being outside.  The chats that I was convinced would not be happening today were in abundance & they too were medicinal.  It was the realization that nature & community were & are both continuous simple pleasures.  The choice became about focusing on the blessings of both of these gifts of that walk.  As I gave our goldie a drink & a good long pat on the fur, I smiled to think that even within the most complicated, the simple can still be found, enjoyed & savored.

My heart’s hope is that if or when you have an “off day” that you already know just the thing or activity that will turn your day into one of simple pleasures too.  You too may not feel like giving yourself that activity at the time yet please remember that we don’t have to listen to every single thing that our minds initially tell us.  Sometimes we have to push through to doing what we need to do even when we don’t feel like it when we experience “those off days.”  If you are not sure what that activity may be for you, a walk may be exactly the thing for you too. 

Smiles, Saundie :)

Have a "right on" week & Friday's sharing is entitled, "Kindness Exponentials"  :)

Do you remember the first car that you owned?  Was it a new or previously owned automobile?  How excited were you about having the independence of those 4 wheels?  It may not have mattered what your “ride” looked like.  It is just plain exciting having that car of your very own.  To share with you, the very first car that I owned was a used car that was in excellent condition.  It was a bright yellow Pontiac Firebird.  It is so ironic that a gal like me would end up with a power car of sorts since even as a young driver, I drove like a “granny.”  And guess what, I am not kidding when I tell you that I literally only went over the speed limit 2 times when I owned that car.  The speed over the limit was just 10kms both times & would you believe that both of those times, I got pulled over by a policeman & given speeding tickets.  That car was like a neon sign for tickets that way but I thought that car was the bee’s knees!  Navigating some of the back roads for my counseling job in that car during winter months in the Grey & Bruce counties was challenging at times.  I still remember trying to get up a big hill that was covered in ice one day & having to take about a dozen runs at it.  Being young & a bit naïve, it really did not faze me that being out in some of those road conditions literally dragging snow under a low car is not exactly the wisest decision.  It was a fun car & brings back great memories.

What’s all this talk about cars got to do with either diabetes or 365 challenges, Saundie?  Some cars can go from a low speed to a very high speed in very short time.  Guess what?  The same is true of our blood sugars when we are managing our diabetes with insulin.  Do you love those days when the snow is all gone & it is gorgeous outside?  Me too!  If we take off our snow tires & put on regular tires for the non-winter seasons, then we may equate this to how we also may at times look at our insulin sensitivities.  My insulin sensitivities are definitely linked to the non-winter seasons.  You may find that this is true for you too.  During the non-winter months, my walk duration increases exponentially.  For instance, it would be fair to say that I go from the average winter walk of 1km to 5-7 kms a day during the other seasons.  My speed of walking increases a great deal too.  In the spring when I think of the introduction of each subsequent season, I get pretty gung ho about getting into that fast walking & increased duration of walks.  It is a little like coming out of a mini-hibernation.  I find that I cannot contain myself.  The trouble comes though when trying to figure out what kind of cut back in insulin I will need to consider prior to the walk & the duration of turning my pump either back or right off.  It is a little like a moving target initially each spring.  My vehicle (body) is operating a little different each spring with each passing year so what worked last year is not the exact formula this year.  This week I have found that I have hit low blood sugars on walks 3 days in a row even with tweaks & adjustments down in insulin.  I will get to the “magical number” to match the exercise yet I have to remind myself to be patient.  Do you have that similar experience?

This afternoon, as always, I packed what seemed like a small diabetic type first aid kit for the walk…you know…water, fast acting sugar, slow acting sugar, cell phone, glucose tester & all that kind of stuff.  I sure needed my fast acting sugar today.  Just before I left to go on the walk, my glucose number was 13.7 which is not great.  Being an optimist however, I did see the positive side to that number & that was that I anticipated that although the walk would certainly bring that number down significantly that it would surely not go into low blood sugar reading levels since it was so high already.  Just like some vehicles that go from low speed to high speed at a fast rate, for some reason, my body did something parallel in the diabetic world to that analogy.  In under 60 minutes, my blood sugar number went from 13.7 to 4.2 & I could feel it going down, down, down, down.  Yikes, I felt like the temperature out was that of Arizona dessert conditions & strangely, I could see something like black dots.  That is a strange thing that happens to me rarely when my blood sugar goes down from a very high number to a low rapidly.  Okay, you know that I have a sense of humour so we are going to get to it very soon.

At 4.2, I thought that I would chase the low blood sugar away by “hoovering in” my fast acting sugars at the speed of sound.  I am sure that I looked like a person who had not eaten in a long time that was eating like a maniac.  The ironic thing is that I am amongst the slowest eaters I am told.  I think my cousin Lindy actually holds the world’s title on slowest eater so I am especially excited when I dine with her!  Too funny.  The trouble is that I realize while I am shoveling in the fast acting sugars that I had chatted too long too many times on the walk & now was in a super big rush to get to the school on time to pick up our sons.  At that point, I picked up an already quick pace to a super speedy pace.  In the meantime a lady came up behind me on her bike with a trailer attached to it.  I did not think anything of it until a couple of minutes later I noticed that the riders in the bike trailer were 2 small black dogs on flexi leashes.  The wee dogs climbed out of the trailer & began running like trained olympic racers!  The lady got back onto her bike & the little dogs were at the end of their flexi leashes just inches away from my dog & I chasing us.  The irony was not lost on me. This went on for at least a km.  I just kept taking in more fast acting carbs.  I don’t know if you can take a fast car down to a slow speed in a short period of time yet there is a parallel world to that when it comes to blood sugars.  Fortunately, I managed to get my blood sugars back up & they looked pretty awesome for about an hour. Unfortunately, after that for the next 3 hours, I was riding the high end of the roller coaster at 17.5!  So I chased the blood sugars in the other direction for those hours however I laughed to think that at least there were no little dogs chasing me while I worked away on correcting the high blood sugars. 

Just like you, I am determined to figure out what the formula for exercise is going to be for me.  It is something worth getting right & I will get there.  This week, I get to learn from the roller coaster blood sugar graph in front of me.  Thank goodness for those graphs & the determination to get it figured out.  It is so worth it though to get out, have a beautiful walk, a chat with community members & get the fresh air & natural vitamin D…even chasing & being chased.

My heart’s hope for you is that you find the formula that works for you as you enjoy all the activities of the season that you love best.  And may any bike trailers not be contained with small dogs on flexi leashes chasing you.  Lol!

Smiles, Saundie  :)

Have a wonderful weekend & Monday's sharing is, "From Complicated to Simple."    :)

At the risk of dating myself, let’s share a popular marketing line from television for a minute.  There are many to choose from.  Today, we will choose, “without the Dream Whip on it, it just isn’t dessert!”  Marketing is clever & do you sometimes find that the commercials out there that stick in your mind tend to be the ones that you were not amused with in the first place?  Even as a kid, I did not believe that something sold in a box was going to turn something that was yummy already into something spectacular.  Also, I sure did not fall for the idea that if I was about to eat something that I already did not like, that any whip cream was going to make the dish any less undesirable.

Have most of us fallen prey to the odd marketing frenzy or stereotype or cliché?  We all get to answer that for ourselves.  I am certain that I have bought into numerous marketing pitches, stereotypes & clichés over the years.  Over time though, my experience has been that I have developed more of a filter for these particular things.  The reason that I have “installed” a mental filter for myself is that I want to be the one feeding my own mind.  Most of us would agree that we do not invite thoughts into our minds that do not meet our best needs on purpose.  Sometimes when we are making use of our “filter” we may find that we will want to keep some forms of clichés since some may serve us well.  A couple of gems from childhood include:  “if everyone is jumping off a cliff, it doesn’t mean that you should too” & “if you don’t have something nice to say, then say nothing at all.”  Those ones I truly adopted decades ago & they are great travelling companions in life.

Would it seem reasonable to say that most folks have given in to the imagery-laden act of “jumping off the cliff like others” or finding that an unkind statement has been inadvertently uttered at times?  We are human after all.  Even when we try our very best to avoid both of these pitfalls, sometimes we fall into them.  We then learn from these experiences & get to choose with more reserve to conquer these tendencies.  It may be a genuine work in progress.  It is easy to get pulled into “group hype” & it takes courage to separate oneself from either an action or a series of words that will not serve our best selves.  The great news is that we get to wake up each day & make a different decision that will grow our best selves in the process. 

Whether we have diabetes or a 365 challenge, we don’t have to believe the marketing, clichés or “group speak” on any given day unless it serves to grow us to be better selves.  When it comes to groups, we can find that some group dynamics lift folks up & other environments pull people down.  We get to discern the groups to participate in.  If a group is requiring us to do or say something that is hurtful to our human family or to us, then we have a pretty easy decision to make about continuing with our participation.  When we are part of a group that is promoting through action & words messages of helping us as well as our human family to grow in goodness, then we have a treasure.  Discernment, courage, and boldness may be the best friends that we can have while making our decisions about groups that we are prepared to participate within.

In my mind, quotes are gems of wisdom.  I absolutely love quotes!  It was Anatole France that said, “If 50 million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.”  If we are driving & we see that there is a pothole ahead of us on the road, what do we do?  Surely, we choose to drive around the pothole because we do not want to damage our cars.  Are our minds, hearts & spirits of more value to us than our cars?  I sure hope so. 

My heart’s hope for you is that you build a filter of sorts for yourself too.  May this filter act as a steadfast tool for screening what is best for you & what is not.

Smiles, Saundie :)